What Are the Best Financial Goals for Couples?

Before I ever had “money relationship goals,” I had a fun-size Snickers in my hand and a single tear rolling down my cheek.

I was parked at the bottom of my staircase, overwhelmed by my finances and feeling stuck. My then-boyfriend (now husband) asked where I was going, and I told him I was about to march upstairs and take a live workshop from a company called YNAB.

“Why?” he asked.

“Because I have no idea where my money’s going… and I’m too scared to look.”

Climbing those stairs marked the beginning of something much bigger than I expected. That workshop—led by a calm, encouraging voice that made everything feel possible—was the start of a completely new relationship with money. One grounded in clarity, collaboration, and a little thing we like to call spendfulness.

Since then, we’ve done a bunch of adulting things: got married, bought a house, and yes, we now enjoy enough abundance to own a self-cleaning litter box. But more importantly, we’ve built a shared life grounded in trust, aligned priorities, and a spending plan we update often.

If money has been a stressor in your relationship, or if you’re craving more clarity and connection around your finances, you’re in the right place. We’ll walk through how to set meaningful savings goals, navigate spending decisions without tension, and start building a future you’re both excited about. 

Life’s too short to keep fighting over money, especially when money can be the very thing that brings you closer.

Why money relationship goals matter

Money touches everything—from your weekend takeout choices to your bucket-list dreams. And when couples don’t talk about it, it doesn’t just sit quietly in the corner. It creeps into conversations, decisions, and stress levels. It creates distance where there could be connection.

Financial stress is one of the biggest sources of tension in relationships, with nearly three in four couples saying financial decisions create strain in their partnership. Not always because there isn’t enough, but because expectations go unspoken, spending habits don’t align, and there’s no shared sense of direction.

That’s where shared financial goals come in. Whether it’s paying off debt, building a safety net, or retirement planning, clear goals help you move forward as a team. They create space for better decisions, fewer arguments (especially over the takeout category), and a deeper sense of partnership.

The good news? You don’t have to figure it all out at once. Here’s how to start building a plan that works for you as individuals—and supports the life you’re creating together. 

YNAB has values-based templates to make the start of something new feel less overwhelming and more exciting. 

Step 1: Open communication about money

In so many healthy relationships, one partner is a “spender” and the other a “saver.” It’s completely normal for opposites to attract. And yes, you can absolutely thrive together. The key? Identifying and talking about your spending personalities.

After all, you can’t build a strong financial future without talking about your financial present.

Start by swapping stories: What did money look like growing up? What’s your gut reaction to an unexpected expense or a surprise bonus? What past experiences with money do you want to relive or avoid? These conversations aren’t about changing each other, but about understanding where you’re both coming from. This is about trust, not perfection.

We make time for money check-ins regularly. It’s become part of our rhythm—sometimes around a laptop, sometimes over coffee. Sometimes we go big, splurge on charcuterie makings and have a money date night.

The goal is simple: stay on the same page and make decisions together, whether we’re talking about insurance coverage or whether we can afford that $4,300 used stair climber one of us saw at the gym. 

(It was a hard no on the stair climber. But we said no together.)

Need a fun, low-pressure way to kick things off? Discover your Spending Personality by both taking this fun quiz. You might find that you’re a “Guardian” while your partner is a “Joy Seeker”—and suddenly, all your Costco runs make a little more sense.

Step 2: Setting financial goals together

Setting goals helps you turn intention into action. Whether you’re working toward a specific purchase or just trying to reduce financial stress, define your shared financial priorities. Go ahead, put pen to paper!

A few common money goals for couples include:

• Paying off debt
• Building an emergency fund (three to six months of living expenses)
• Saving for big-ticket items like a down payment
• Preparing for medical expenses or upcoming travel
• Growing your retirement accounts and long-term financial security
• Making space for hobbies and passions, guilt-free
• Getting a month ahead of your expenses
• Trying 100 new restaurants in one year (like one of my YNAB coworkers and her husband did!)

You don’t have to approach money the same way. One of you might live for spreadsheets while the other just wants to know if you can go out to dinner. YNAB gives you a middle ground and keeps your shared short-term and long-term goals in focus.

Step 3: Creating a spending plan that reflects both partners

It’s rare for two people to come into a relationship with the same money mindset. And honestly? That’s a good thing. What matters is creating a financial plan that reflects your individual priorities, your shared financial objectives, and the realities of your current financial situation.

Take us, for example: music is a huge part of my husband’s world. He’s saving money for a sound recording system and maybe another guitar (or two). That’s not something I personally need a category for, but I love that he has one—because it brings him joy. 

Meanwhile, I geek out over birding supplies, and he doesn’t ask questions when a new field guide shows up in the mail or binoculars show up on the credit card statement. There’s room in our plan for both of us.

And then there are the common goals we have, like saving up for a bigger home where we don’t have to accidentally salsa dance every time we’re in the kitchen. That’s long-term financial planning that makes us both feel excited for the future.

YNAB helps us make room for it all: the hobbies, the joint priorities, and even the less-fun stuff like covering living expenses and preparing for unexpected costs. We check in often, adjust as needed, and stay in sync.

Step 4: Handling financial challenges as a team

Here’s where having a shared system really pays off.

*Cue the laugh-crying.* In a two-week stretch recently, we’ve experienced:

• Two car breakdowns (yes, both cars—and one stranded us in Montana)
• Extra days of road trip expenses for said breakdown in Montana
• Broken vacuum
• Dead smoke detectors
• A house-wide plumbing issue
• A home security outage, which led to a Wi-Fi meltdown and monthly upgrade
• A broken porch light (because of course)

We tracked every hit. Not to wallow, but to laugh. Because even with everything breaking, we didn’t. We made decisions calmly, moved money around in YNAB, and adjusted our plan.

When life gets unpredictable (and it will), the YNAB Method makes it easier to respond with flexibility—and a surprising amount of humor. Do you know how many plumbing puns I came up with last week? Old me would’ve spiraled over the cost, with zero room for laughing about it. New me just moves money from another category and keeps going. 

And when bigger changes come your way, like job loss or family planning, revisiting your plan together keeps you grounded. 

Step 5: Tracking progress and adjusting as needed

Financial goals aren’t a set-it-and-forget-it situation. They evolve as your life does.

We revisit our shared plan often. YNAB’s visual spending report in the Reflect tab helps us track financial success, adjust our goals, and make sure our financial situation still aligns with what matters most. Sometimes it’s a quick tweak. Sometimes it’s a giant refresh. Sometimes it’s a fresh start altogether!  

In YNAB-speak, that means asking the question: What changes do we need to make, if any?

Either way, it’s a moment to reconnect. And to celebrate the progress we’ve made together—from the big wins to the tiny, satisfying “we moved this category and now it just works” moments.

What spendfulness really means for couples

Spendfulness isn’t just about saying yes to fun purchases. It’s about making intentional, collaborative decisions that reflect your values.

That might look like booking the trip. Or saying “not right now” to something that sounds exciting but doesn’t serve your goals. The point isn’t whether you spend—it’s how and why you spend. 

And if you’re in a season where money feels like a constant fight, or where it feels like there’s never enough—you’re not alone. We’ve been there too. When money is tight, hope can feel like a luxury. Spendfulness is a way to move from reacting to planning, from stress to shared clarity.

But even then, spendfulness gives you a starting point. It helps you talk through tradeoffs, name your priorities, and take small steps toward milestones that make you happy. It won’t fix everything overnight, but it can bring peace into your conversations, and that peace can ripple outward.

Sometimes the biggest shift isn’t in your income. It’s in how you see your money and each other.

Strengthening your relationship through financial planning

Money touches everything—your home, your holidays, your hobbies, your sense of peace when you open your bank account. But it doesn’t have to be a source of tension. It can be a way to grow closer.

When you align your financial goals as a couple, you’re building a spending plan and building trust. You’re saying, “We’re in this together, [Pet Name You Call Your Loved One]!” whether you’re deploying dollars toward big-ticket dreams, navigating living expenses, or just figuring out what’s for dinner when you’re tired of chicken.

If you had told me in my twenties that I’d be a married woman saving up for a bigger kitchen and genuinely excited to check my spending plan each day, I would’ve laughed. Loudly. But people change. Relationships evolve. Priorities shift. And so should your plan.

Building a spending plan together can actually be a source of excitement—a reason to dream and collaborate and reconnect. You just have to start.

89% of YNABers say they feel more comfortable talking about money—imagine what that could mean for your relationship! Add a loved one to your subscription for free and start building shared clarity and confidence, together.

YNAB IRL

Two kids, two cars, a new home, and a new job… All with YNAB.

Gabi and her husband started YNAB to get their finances in order before the arrival of their first child, and since then they have accomplished so much more! Like…⁠⁠

💸 Paid off $36k in student loans⁠

🚙 Paid off two cars in full⁠

❤️ Created memories with their family⁠

We had tried other things and they just didn’t stick. YNAB is simply the best. It hasn’t always been easy – there have still been times of stress and when we made the wrong decisions about our priorities, but I always knew there was enough there for the necessities for living. That peace of mind came from YNAB.