The Difference Between Spending and Swiping (And How to Fix It!)

I thought I knew how to spend money. I thought as long as there was money available when I wanted to buy something, I was doing the right thing, gosh darnit—it didn’t matter if it was a credit card payment, a meal out, or another second-hand t-shirt. As long as the money in my checking account covered the price tag, my spending was a success! 

That was my entire system. “Does my account look… fine-ish?” Great. Proceed.

But why did every purchase feel like it came with a tiny side of regret? I couldn’t stop second-guessing my spending decisions. The smallest surprise gave me a pit in my stomach. I just didn’t get it—I had the money for the things I bought. I was spending my money the right way. Wasn’t I?

Turns out I didn’t know how to spend money after all. What I actually knew was how to swipe. And there’s a difference. Spending is intentional. Swiping is reactive—which, I know, probably sounds like splitting hairs. But trust me, it’s not. 

What Is Swiping and Why It Creates Money Worry

Swiping is how the money leaves. It’s fast, frictionless, and emotion-driven. You swipe when your browser autofills the credit card section at the checkout and you don’t even look at the total. You swipe when you order takeout on your commute home because “it’s been a day.” 

In situations like these, money is leaving, and the tradeoffs are invisible. You have no idea what you just gave up in the coming weeks or months.

That’s the reactive nature of swiping—and here’s the tricky part: it feels like spending. But swiping is a decision made in the moment. Spending is a decision made before the moment arrives. 

Swiping feels like spending, but it’s a decision made in the moment, without seeing the tradeoffs.

And then there’s the emotional cost. When you’re swiping, you’re constantly surprised by what’s in your checking account. You can’t shake the anxiety of what will happen if one more unexpected expense pops up. You feel like you’re always catching up, never getting ahead. 

YNABer Kimberly M. knows what I’m talking about:

I had so much financial anxiety pre-YNAB. Swipe my debit card and hope for the best. Add that to working during the pandemic as a nurse and having a new family, my hair was falling out from the stress. I cannot express the amount YNAB has reduced my overall anxiety. I paid off $80k debt in 4.5 years.

And then comes the final blow, the voice in your head that says: “I guess I’m just bad with money.”  Which is wild, because you pay your bills. You’re responsibly adulting, and you’re trying!

Why Discipline and Willpower Don’t Fix Reactive Swiping

Once we hear that voice, we’ll try everything we can to silence it. Maybe you ramp up the discipline and commit to a no-buy month. You grit your teeth and tell yourself you’ll try harder next month. (January has entered the chat). You convince yourself that earning more will solve all these swiping problems. But here’s the thing—none of this ever works. 

Why? Because this approach is trying to fix the wrong problem. It’s like putting a band-aid on your elbow when you’ve actually skinned your knee. This isn’t about your character. Nor is it some moral failure. You’re swiping because no one ever taught you the skill of spending money. ‍

You became an accidental expert at swiping, but now you can learn the skill of spending.

How to Learn Intentional Spending With Zero-Based Budgeting

And trust me, I get it. I swiped my way through my twenties and into my thirties like an absolute credit card maniac. I was chaotic, committed, and completely unaware.

But learning to spend instead of swipe? That’s when I finally got good with money.

Here’s what spending actually means—you’re separating the spending decision from the spending moment. At YNAB, we have a phrase for this: Give Every Dollar a Job. Before you spend any of your money, you decide what every dollar is for. It’s slow and intentional; the opposite of swiping in every way.

Spending happens before the purchase, when every dollar already has a job.

‍Swiping vs. Spending: The Same Purchase, Two Different Experiences

Let’s walk through what this actually looks like. 

It’s Saturday afternoon, and I’m at Costco. I find a set of wedges I’ve been dying to add to my golf bag. If I’m swiping, I’ll open up my banking app, take a quick peek at my checking account, and convince myself, “Yeah, I can probably afford these.” (The most expensive phrase in personal finance.) 

Then as soon as the attendant checks my receipt, my gut begins to turn. 

I remember I have a car appointment on Monday—what if something major is wrong? How am I going to pay for that? And then I remember my water bill auto-drafts next week before payday, and I’ve made plans to go out with my buddy for the big game on Sunday. I’m dealing with regret, second-guessing, and worry. Swiping is just how the money goes out the door.

If I was spending intentionally, it’s a completely different story. I see the wedges, and I open up the YNAB app to look at my Golfing category. Golf is a priority for me, so I have been setting aside money from every paycheck for it. I have more than enough to buy the wedges. Perfect! I’ll take them! 

The attendant checks my receipt and wishes me a great day. I’m smiling ear to ear because I’m heading straight to the course to hit some balls. I’m not worried about car repairs on Monday because I’ve been setting money aside for those, too. And for that water bill. And for the night out with my friend. Everything I could possibly spend money on is accounted for. 

Spending is when you choose what your money is for.

‍The Transformation from Swiping to Spending Builds Confidence

I remember the moment this clicked. It was early in my second attempt at YNAB (the first did not end well). I was looking at my spending plan when I realized: “This is real money.” 

It wasn’t projected income or Monopoly dollars. I was looking at real amounts of money in my account, waiting for instructions from me. At that moment, everything made sense. I had already decided what this money was for. Now I was free to actually spend it. And the confidence I felt? I’d never experienced anything like it.

And this was just the beginning. Paycheck after paycheck, I just kept giving every dollar a job. The more I practiced, the more intentional my spending became. What followed? Fewer surprises. Less second-guessing. Less guilt. I put bills on autopay because I knew the money was there. I made tradeoffs without regret because I could see what mattered most.

Looking back, I’m proud of my transformation from reactive swiping to intentional spending. I went from constant money worry to genuine confidence. From second-guessing every purchase to knowing exactly what my money is for. Turns out, confidence with money isn’t about earning more or trying harder. It’s about deciding ahead of time.

That’s what giving every dollar a job gave me—and that’s what it can give you, too.

Have you ever worried about money? You’re not alone. Download YNAB, get good with money, and never worry about money again.

Good With Money: Real YNABer Stories

Jessica T. wrote in with a relatable transformation: from competitive swiping to “I can finally see where my money is going!” with YNAB.

I started using YNAB in November 2021. I wanted to give up so many times, but I knew that if I gave up then I would just end up in the same boat I was always in… not knowing where our money was going. We would pay our bills and the rest we would spend as free money. I’m so glad I pushed through because Christmas was right after I started utilizing YNAB and it was truly eye opening to see how much money we were spending not only on gifts, but also on eating out and just unplanned fun with family and friends. It was more like: “Oh, the money is in our account, swipe!”

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When we didn’t use YNAB, I would budget ahead and count on money I hadn’t received. But I now know that doesn’t help. YNAB has pushed me to break my big goals down into smaller chunks, write out and create a plan for our debt and just have a mindful spending plan. What I love about YNAB is there is still so much room for fun, eating out and vacations… but they have to be [planned] for.

I’m no longer stressed about money and I’m not scared to open our banking app and wonder what I’ll see. We also aren’t missing bills because we forgot them since I have them all written out… AND THINGS ARE GETTING PAID ON TIME! I just overall have such a better relationship with money and our financial goals.

By utilizing YNAB, so many things are becoming our reality. We are facing our financial truths. Paying off our debt and saving is no longer just a dream. I’m no longer wondering where all of our money went. Through a lot of trial and error I’ve learned our money habits, both good and bad, and I appreciate having YNAB as a guide to just push us in the right direction. I mean it when I say YNAB is truly for EVERYBODY, no matter what your financial situation looks like.