Happily Living With Ambiguous Purpose In Retirement

We’ve all heard it before. One of the tricks to having a happy retirement comes down to feeling purposeful. Great! However, feeling a sense of purpose requires understanding what that even means. That’s where we are left on our own to figure it out. It did take me a little time to land on what it meant to me. I chose living happily with an ambiguous purpose in retirement. It’s just fine not having a finely tuned definition. I do however always know it when I feel it and when I don’t feel it. The best part is, my retirement happiness doesn’t require that the rest of the world understands it.   

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The Way I See Having An Ambiguous Purpose In Retirement

There’s all kinds of advice on how to find purpose in retirement. Mostly it comes down to intentional actions that are aligned with our values. I feel that my base defined intentional retirement is commonly shared with many who retire: 

• Living an active and healthier lifestyle, both physically and mentally 

• Concentrating on and prioritising family relationships

• Staying on top of our finances so that it lasts as long as we do 

• Having an active and expanding social life

• Volunteering to assist causes that matter to me and my community 

When it comes to thoughts about living with purpose, there can come a time when base retirement intentions don’t feel like enough. 

I believe that’s because of the decades of systematic conditioning. It was pounded into us from the time we were in school and then throughout our jobs. We were conditioned to always be productive and measurably graded or ranked to earn any feeling of accomplishment. Comfort and happiness is nothing but slacking-off and we must push harder. No wonder we end up feeling like we must be purposeful to have a happy retirement.

Then there are those super promoters who showcase their elaborate lifestyles and doings that can cause us to compare with ours. It can sometimes be difficult with everything that is flaunted today. But we have to step back and just be happy with the blessings we do have and what we can intend to do as enough to consider ourselves purposeful. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks.

Living with an ambiguous purpose in retirement means that it doesn’t have to be noble, just intentional.

I did have to convince myself that there’s more to purposeful living than splashy accomplishments beyond my base retirement lifestyle intentions. When I first retired early at the age of 51, I did purposely pursue and accomplish what I considered impressive retirement opportunities and some volunteering that was too physical for my youngish low 50s age. Although they were driven by interest and passion, I soon learned that the feeling of purpose can be fleeting. Once done, it doesn’t provide the continued mental comfort of purposeful living. It caused me to question whether I should be looking for something more and perhaps that my retirement is lacking. 

Here’s the thing- It’s easy to make retirement more complicated than it needs to be. 

As I found out after a few years into this retirement ride, we are constantly evolving. My interests and passions have changed right along in that evolution. So should our thoughts about purpose. Any plans of intention should be based on now. It should change when conditions change. What it takes to support my base retirement intentions needs to evolve to remain meaningful.

Aside from base defined intentions for living a happy retirement, number one is enjoying the freedom and time that retirement provides. Everything else about having a big purpose brings dubious results. All big accomplishments soon become only memories. Misguided intentions may even result in unintended consequences. Consequence is something that must always be considered. In the end, it’s our overall retirement lifestyle purpose that brings meaning that matters.

I’ve found that aside from my base retirement intentions, following my values and using my skills to support them is a worthy purpose. The beauty of having an ambiguous purpose in retirement is that even intentionally sitting something out can meet purposeful living when knowing the reasons why. 

Striving to fill my curiosity is another intention that meets a purposeful retirement. The more I learn, the more I understand how much I don’t know or what I can and cannot do. Some curiosities burn-out after digging just far enough to see it isn’t of interest or value to me. Others can lead to a deeper dive into different branches and improve my understanding of myself, the world, and life. 

Warning, the concept of having purpose in retirement is a worthy pursuit but can lead to discouragement. 

The way I see it, the key is figuring out what it is we value, both big and small. Then forming the intention to purposely support it. The fun part is that there are no rules to having a purposeful retirement. We get to define what it is. If there’s a feeling that our retirement life isn’t purposeful enough, then there should never be feelings of shame or defeat. We can just purposely pledge to act with intention to make it better and do what it takes to make it happen.